Can we do this again?
by lorelaivictoriadanes
Summary: Set in S7. Lorelai did sleep with Chris but nothing happened after that. Lorelai has told Chris it was a mistake, there is has been no further contact since. The last time Luke & Lorelai have spoken was when Lorelai told Luke she slept with Christopher. T


Lorelai did sleep with Chris but nothing happened after that. Lorelai has told Chris it was a mistake, there is has been no further contact since. The last time Luke & Lorelai have spoken was when Lorelai told Luke she slept with Christopher. They haven't seen each other in weeks.

Luke was busy wiping down the counter of the diner. He sighed again, he'd been doing a lot of that lately. The bells on the door jingled.

"We're closed" Luke said sternly without looking up

"Luke" a small timid voice said "I just want to see how you are?"

Luke paused before looking up then came face to face with the daughter of his ex-fiancé "R…Rory ..hi…um.. sure..coffee?" Luke stumbled.

"Thanks if you have some" Rory stopped "Of course this is a diner, sorry"

Luke poured Rory a cup of her favorite brew then an uneasy silence fell.

Luke shifted from foot to foot as Rory stared into her coffee. Finally she looked at Luke "I'm sorry"

Luke looked at her puzzled "What?"

"I'm sorry about you know, you and mum and.. Dad and things" Luke said looking into her cup again.

"Rory you have nothing to be sorry about" Luke said walking closer to her. "This isn't your fault"

"I know, but I'm still sorry… I …" Rory's eyes started to well up "I really wanted you to marry mum, out of everyone Luke, you have always been the father figure in my life. You were at all my arties, you were always there" Rory was now rambling in the typical Gilmore way "You were there when I was sick, you fed us, you even gave me your mothers necklace as a birthday gift" Rory suddenly stopped "Oh Luke, I should, I'm sorry" Rory reached around her neck and unclasped the necklace and handed it to Luke.

Luke looked puzzled "No Rory it's yours"

"But Luke I didn't think, I mean this was your mothers necklace. And you now have April, your daughter she should have it" Rory moved her hand forward again.

"Rory I would really like you to keep it, really…"

"But" Rory started, she didn't really want to give the necklace back, it meant so much to her but she felt it was the right thing to do.

"I have others, I have one put away for April on her 21st, please Rory it's yours"

"Thanks" Rory said smiling.

They fell into another silence before Luke cleared his throat "How… How's your mom?"

"She's okay" Rory tried to force a smile

"Good.. I just… she hasn't been in here since… I just wanted to make sure"

"I've gotta go" Rory stammered then took her purse out searching for some money

"It's on the house" Luke smiled

Rory tried to smile again before almost running out the door.

Luke took the coffee up into the kitchen then began wiping down the counter again when once again the diner door swung open.

"she's not okay" Rory said breathlessly. "she not okay Luke and I don't know what to do."

Luke stopped again but said nothing.

"She's miserable and there's nothing I can say to her because I'm so mad at her. I mean, she slept with my father, the bloke who has never been there for us, has never been around for mom unless it suited him. She's sorry, I know she regrets what she did, I know she hates herself but I'm just so mad at her. She loves you Luke, she's miserable without you and all I want to do is yell at her but I can't she's my mother and she's hurting and I just…" Rory finally took a break and burst into tears. "I just… Luke… she loves you so much and she's miserable without you."

Luke walked over to Rory and hugged her. "I'm miserable without her too" Luke whispered without thinking.

Rory took a few deep breathes, Luke I'm really sorry. I didn't mean to come here and dump all this on you, I just needed someone to talk to"

"Its okay" Luke smiled. "Anytime you need to talk…"

"Thanks" Rory smiled wiping the tears away with the back of her hand. "I'd better go, it's a long drive back"

Luke nodded as Rory turned and walked out the door.

Luke didn't move, just sighed. His admission surprised him. He knew he was miserable without Lorelai. He was angry and hurt and sad all at once. He was scared and fuming.

He'd spent the last few weeks not trying not to think about Lorelai. It hurts too much.

Luke turned the lights off and headed upstairs. At the top of the stairs he suddenly turned around, ran down the stairs and out of the diner door. He ran through the town and stopped as he reached the familiar house. The light in the living room was on. Luke ran up to the front door and knocked harder than he meant to. After a few seconds the door swung open, Lorelai was standing there with a shocked look on her face. She didn't say anything, neither did Luke.

After a few more moments of silence Lorelai whispered "Luke"

Luke starred up her then mumbling an apology as he ran down her porch stairs and into the night.

Lorelai fell to her knees in tears. She couldn't deal with this.

Luke kept running back through town before he stopped out of breath. "Damn it" He shouted Punching the air. He had no idea why he went to Lorelai and no idea why he ran. "I'm loosing my mind" Luke thought to himself. Luke took a few more deep breaths before turning and once again walking through town.

When he was once again out the front of Lorelai's house the front door was still open, Lorelai still punch on the floor. Luke could hear her sobbing as he approached the house. He had come back to yell at her, to swear and carry on and get it all out of his system. He couldn't go on like this but as soon he saw Lorelai and heard her sobbing all the anger disappeared, replaced by concern and heartache.

He walked up the steps and crouched down next to her "Lorelai" Luke placed his hand on her lack and Lorelai flinched.

She looked up at Luke, tears now streaming down his face. "Just go Luke"

"I'm sorry I came here, I don't know why I did, I just had to see you. I mean, this, us, what happened, why? I'm loosing it Lorelai. I'm loosing my mind. I'm so mad at you but I can't stop thinking about you, I'm so hurt but spend the day wondering when I will see you, I'm so messed up." Luke ranted between sobs. "I want to hate you I do, but I can't"

Lorelai just stared at him, her face red "Is that why you came here? I make me feel worse than I already do? Too late Luke, I couldn't possibly feel any worse. I fucked up okay, I know it, you know it, but I wasn't the only one to blame in all this. You didn't want me, you didn't want to marry me"

"What do mean I didn't want to marry you, I gave you a ring didn't I?" I told you over and over I wanted to marry you"

"Talk is cheap buddy" Lorelai spat back. "You were never going to marry me, you have your daughter and you didn't care about me anymore. You didn't care I was hurting, you didn't care"

"Leave April out of this, this has nothing to do with her" Luke voice was getting louder.

"You didn't tell me about her Luke, You kept her from me for two months. What happened to no secrets Luke? You were the one who said no secrets then you don't tell me you have a daughter? We were engaged but you didn't tell me. I only found out because I turned up at the diner, how long were you going to go without telling me. Then you postpone the wedding, you gave me no indication that it was ever going to happen. The you keep me away from her. You wouldn't let me know your daughter. I was going to be your wife yet I wasn't good enough to meet your kid" Lorelai yelled

"I told you why" Luke screamed back "I told you that I wanted a chance to get to know her.'

"Well I gave you space Luke, I gave you so much time and it was killing me"

"So you thought you just go and sleep with Christopher"

"Hey hey you two" Luke and Lorelai stopped and looked at Babette was yelling from her front door. "Sugar, we're trying to get some sleep here, can you two just kiss already so we can all get some sleep" babette slammed her door shut again.

Luke & Lorelai looked at eachother "Just go Luke" Lorelai stood up and walked into her living room she then heard the front door shut. She began to cry again when she heard Luke say "No"

Lorelai turned towards the front door.

"No I'm not going anywhere. You and I, we're going to finish this. I'm sick of us avoiding eachother, I'm sick of feeling like I do. My stomach aches, my head hurts and it's maddening. We're going to yell and scream and call each other names and we're going to get this out of our system" Luke started to raise his voice again.

"What for? I'm evil.. The end!" Lorelai streamed back at him.

"What for?.. what for?… because the sooner we get this shouting match over with the sooner we can start again"

Lorelai's mouth was wide open, she was ready to scream back at him but that caught her off guard. "start again?"

"Damn it Lorelai, don't… I… I want to try again. Call me mad but I can't live without you. I tried and it's killing me. You hurt me, I'm not going to deny that and I know I hurt you but I can't keep living like this…" Luke looked defeated, he'd said it.

Lorelai just stood there, staring at him. She hadn't moved, Luke wasn't sure she was breathing.

"Lorelai say something!"

"I…I.. can't… do this" Lorelai turned and ran up the stairs.

"Lorelai Luke ran after her… Lorelai you and me, I want this, I'm all in, please" Luke was begging and it broke Lorelai's heart.

"Luke please don't do this, I can't do this anymore. I can't have my heart broken again I can't risk stuffing my life up and yours again, just go"

"No…not until you look at me… Lorelai look at me and tell me that this is it"


End file.
